Friday, March 02, 2007

Bernie Bat Signal, Answer The Bat Phone, Please

With Bobby Abreu, out possibly until Opening Day, the Yankees need a 4th outfielder. The Yankees can not rely on the young guys to carry them to the Grapefruit League title. The Yankees are in a must-win game everytime out. It's time to turn on the Bernie Bat Signal, make Bernie the Bat Phone call, give him a guaranteed deal. His services are needed and now.

Other News:
Get ready to see a whole lot more of fragile Yankees pitcher Carl Pavano's stunning fiancée, Gia Allemand. The Howard Beach bombshell has entered Maxim's 2007 Hometown Hotties contest and posted four sizzling snapshots on the magazine's Web site. The brown-haired beauty had been pursued by Penthouse and agreed to do a photo spread if she could cover her nipples with her long tresses, but the deal fell through when Penthouse told her it had a "no hair over the boobs" policy.

Carl Pavano yesterday threw off a mound for the first time since taking a comebacker off his left foot and pronounced himself ready for his spring debut this weekend. "I didn't really have too many concerns from the beginning," he said, "just because of the progress I've made." Pavano, who has not pitched in the majors since June 2005, was hit Saturday while throwing batting practice to teammates (he declined to use a protective screen). An MRI showed the injury to be only a bone bruise.

Yanks manager Joe Torre seemed most pleased with the performance of Ross Ohlendorf, the starter from Princeton who was acquired from Arizona in the trade for Randy Johnson. Ohlendorf pitched two scoreless innings and got ground balls with ease. “He had real good sink,” Torre said. “He looks like he’s real polished out there.”

Jason Giambi on the Yankees first spring training game: "I felt kind of sexy up there today and I don't know why," Giambi said. "I usually look to get hot the last week of the spring." Johnny Damon built a gym in his Orlando home this past off-season and bulked up to the point he said he came to camp five pounds over the 212-pound reporting date. He has shed four pounds since arriving. "I wanted to look good with my shirt off," Damon said of hitting the weights. "My wife still digs me. You have to keep your sexiness at all times."

A brash Lou Piniella tells correspondent Frank Deford in the latest edition of HBO's "Real Sports" that the Cubs "are gonna win now." "That's all I can tell you," Piniella adds. Actually the new Cubs skipper has much more to say, but the segment's most compelling moment comes when Alex Rodriguez, who played for Piniella in Seattle, recalls flailing away at a series of Dennis Eckersley sliders. After Rodriguez returned to the bench, nearly in tears, Piniella kissed him on the top of his head and said: "Son, I love you."

For the purpose of financial flexibility, and maybe peace of mind too, Alex Rodriguez has not taken the option of opting out of his Yankees contract (worth $25 mil per) off the table. As long as the option to opt out at the end of this season is available, there will be buzz over whether A-Rod already has another destination in mind. Speculation will mount Monday night (10 p.m.) when Rodriguez appears on HBO's "Real Sports With Bryant Gumbel." If you come away sensing the Yankees third baseman has the Windy City on his mind you will have plenty of company. During a profile of new Cubs manager Lou Piniella, who managed Rodriguez for seven seasons in Seattle, A-Rod is interviewed by Frank Deford. While Deford never asks Rodriguez to compare Piniella to Joe Torre, it is abundantly clear the managerial qualities - and style - A-Rod enthusiastically attributes to Piniella are not subscribed to by the Yankees manager. ... And yet, yesterday, Rodriguez told Daily News Yankees beat writer Mark Feinsand a reunion with Pinella is not likely to be in the cards. "He's on a different team in a different league," Rodriguez said. "My memories of Lou are in the present and the past, not the future."

5 Comments:

Blogger Anthony said...

Pavano's lady friend is something. Meanwhile Jeter--who rarely misses a day--is dating some chick who's built like my mother and even she won't put out for him. I'd write a haiku about it were I not stinking sick of the whole injustice thing.

8:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thanks for replying. Good to know at least 1 other person cares enough to at least say something.

Jeter should have stayed with Jessica Biel. She'll "suck the paint off your house and give your family a permanent orange afro."

Sorry to hear your mom won't put out for Derek Jeter.

6:25 AM  
Blogger Anthony said...

Now that there is a well placed Spies Like Us quote!

8:31 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Every minute you don't tell us where he is I cut off a finger.
Mine or yours?
Yours!

5:20 PM  
Blogger TheJackSack said...

I'm glad the Yanks are feelin' sexy.

Could you imagine Donnie Baseball, Mickey Mantle and Gator saying these idiotic statements when they we're playing?

I'd puke in a bucket were I not stinking sick of the whole injustice thing. ;)

9:25 AM  

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